.frustration.

It’s so frustrating to always have someone tearing you down. Even when you know that the particular person has no clue they’re doing it, it’s so incredibly angrifying!!! Right now the last thing I need to hear is that I’m not going to get better and that I’m not going to be going back to college in the spring. Right now my mind will not let me tolerate hearing shenanigans like this. It stumbles me in way that just makes me almost hate people who say things like this. I do know that it is a possibility, but not one that I need to face, not today. Because that is not today’s problem. And people who try to navigate my life for me. So many people just want to steer my life. They think I will never make the right decisions and want to do everything for me, when it’s time for me to be a woman instead of little girl. I KNOW WHAT I AM FACING! I know that this is my problem. I know that I am having surgery in 2 weeks. I know everything could go wrong and I could still be sick for months. I know I may have to cancel my flight. I know who I am. I know that I am 18. I know that I am Jordan Ellyse Wagner and whether life is good or bad, I am stuck here and I want this life!!!! And I don’t want anyone else telling me what to do with it. Frustration is today’s problem.
Lord, give me peace.